


It Doesn't Hurt Anymore

by orphan_account



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/M, Zeta Society - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-11
Updated: 2015-02-11
Packaged: 2018-03-11 21:10:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3332993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account





	It Doesn't Hurt Anymore

You're glad she's happy, it's all you've wanted for her, but it doesn't make it hurt any less that you couldn't be the source of that happiness. You avoid common areas where the chances of running into the happy couple are increased. You tell yourself to get over her, that you were never really a couple. You can't lose what you never really had. So you spend your days holed up in your room and your nights being dragged out by friends to bars to get you over her. Kirsch invites himself one night because, _'It's like a bros duty to get a bro laid when they have their heart broken.'_ He spends his night trying his hardest to make you smile. At first it's irritating, his optimism and his sunny disposition. That goofy smile he's always sporting is a constant reminder of just how sad you are. It surprises you though how smooth he is with the ladies. He has no problem getting one to go home with you and for a few brief hours that night it doesn't hurt anymore.

//

She's gone before you wake the next morning. A part of you is happy, the morning after a one night stand is never not a bit awkward. The other part of you is just reminded that you're once again alone. Until there's a knock at the door. You sluggishly pull yourself out of bed and slip into your jeans and tee to open the door. It's Kirsch again. The coffee and donuts he brought almost make up for that ridiculous smile plastered on his face. You're convinced he's some sort of robot, because no one is that happy this early in the morning. With vampires and demons of light, robots cant be too far out of a theory, can it? In yet another surprise he asks how things went with the blonde from the bar last night but doesn't push for details like most men would, just to get off on it later.

'It was good.' is all that you can say. It's all that you really want to say about the situation.

You kinda like that Kirsch doesn't push you to talk about your feelings like most of your girl friends. So you just sit, eating your donuts, drinking your coffee, and talking about anything that isn't Laura. Without realizing it an hour has passed and you have to get to class but for that hour you weren't completely alone and it doesn't hurt anymore.

//

They're sitting by the fountain laughing, Carmilla's arm around Laura. Laura spots you and her demeanor changes. She whispers something to Carmilla and begins walking towards you. You're frozen, not sure if you should turn around and walk away or just deal with it, this was bound to happen eventually. Out of nowhere Kirsch swoops in and begins talking to Laura. You have no idea what they're talking about and whether or not it was just a strategic move on Kirsch's part. Nonetheless, you're grateful he's given you some time to get away.

//

For two weeks now, Kirsch comes over every night at ten and you go out, a different bar every night, except tonight. Tonight, you end up at the batting cages. Kirsch's uncle owns it so you've got the whole place to yourselves. He opens the gate to let you in then runs back to his car without a word and returns with a bag of baseballs. With a big grin he holds two of them up to show he's taped pictures of Camilla and Laura to them. You can't help but laugh at his genius. It's been a good while since you laughed like that without a couple of drinks first. Its childish, you know, but hitting balls with the happy couples faces on it was definitely therapeutic. The night's filled with laughter and teasing because for an athletic guy with unlimited access to batting cages Kirsch swings a bat much like you'd imagine a monkey would. _'I'm more of a soccer guy.'_ he claims. Before you know it your arms are around him, your hands are placed over his on the bat and your hips are swinging in sync as you teach him the proper way to swing. It's not as awkward as you thought it would be. He doesn't press his back to you to feel your breasts. He doesn't make any frat boy jokes like you expected him to and he's actually interested in learning from you.

You raid the concession stand and discover you share a love for drinking orange soda through twizzlers and eating sour patch kids in popcorn. It takes a while but he finally figures out how to work the com and the cages fill with nineties music. You're both quiet enjoying the the music and the pile of snacks on the table when Deep Blue Something's  _'Breakfast at Tiffany's'_ starts playing and you both start singing along, getting a bit too into it, dancing like idiots with air guitars and head banging. The song fades into a Mazzy Star's _'Fade into You'_ and he holds his hand out to you, without hesitating you take it. He pulls you to him and puts his arm around your waist.You close your eyes and you can't imagine a better feeling than his breath on your ear and his body pressed to yours as you sway to the music. The song fades out, with matching smiles and racing hearts you pull back just enough to lock eyes. For a brief second you think he's going to kiss you and for an even briefer second you wanted him to, scared by that thought you pull away. He doesn't question you, he doesn't make it awkward, he just accepts your decision and you both go back to eating and talking about anything and everything.

Suddenly it's four in the morning, time seemed to fly by but you can remember every second of it because you genuinely had fun with Kirsch. You find yourself watching, waiting for that goofy smile that once irritated you, because when he smiles at you like that it doesn't hurt anymore, nothing hurts.

You let him walk you to your door. It's something he wants to do every time you go out but he respects that you don't like feeling like you need his protection so he doesn't. You say your goodbyes and as hes walking away you call out his name. He turns around and waits.

"Kiss me."

He's speechless.

"I should've let you, back at the cages, but I got scared. I don't know why. I just-" before you can finish your sentence he closes the distance between the two of you and presses his lips to yours. He's soft and warm and exactly how you imagined he would be.

You wake the next morning with his arms still wrapped around you. You turn slowly, careful not to wake him, so you could see his face. You try to pinpoint the exact moment you began looking at him and seeing more than a zeta meathead, except there wasn't an exact moment. The road from enemies to friends was smoother than either of you expected it to be. The transition from friends to lovers, seamless.

It took two months and one Kirsch but it doesn't hurt anymore.


End file.
